The Bounty Book Voice

What the Bounty Book doesn’t tell you

The pregnancy and post-natal bible – The Bounty Book will be your well thumbed reference guide to one of the most stressful times in your life. Pregnancy niggles, health and well being all of it’s in there. Or is it?

You will undergo many transformations as a person, both physically and mentally. You are going to experience many things that the Bounty Book does not tell you about.

The Bounty Book Voice

This is a phenomenon that strikes even the most child hating of parents. No matter how tired, how fed up or shattered you are, from the day your child is born your vocal cords change. Instead of your normal local burr growling out, instead out booms this sugary, enthusiastic voice. The more tired you are the more demented it can sound.

This voice must surely come with the Bounty Book Pack.

You are on a bus. The kids are crying. They don’t care anymore about the simple distractions like “wow look at that car” or “It’s a Neenah” or “Look at the moos and the baas”. They are screaming blue, bloody murder but still the voice comes out. You are determined not to be the red faced raging parent that you look down upon. No! You are going to maintain control and show those frowning grannies that your child is well behaved, under control and that you firmly support the no smacking rule.

You are the super nanny. And to polish it off the soothing, enthusiastic, bloody irritating voice flows out no matter how much your heart races and the sweat pours out. This was never, ever mentioned in the Bounty Book. Why not?